It's been two months since I checked in. Two. Hard to believe how fast the universe moves when you are wrangling three kids and a husband to manage life.
The babies are now five months old and hitting all sorts of milestones that I won't bore you to death with the details. Rolling over, holding bottles, blowing spit bubbles, and puking on the reg. You know, the fun stuff.
Smith has been a handful of chaos lately. Remind me who the asshole was that said 4 was magical because I'm pretty sure that I want to gouge their eyeballs out with spoons. 4 has been nothing but a shit storm of attitude mixed with tantrums and a side of demands. I'm really kind of over it. We had some sleep and potty regression issues that drove me about 3/4 of an inch from the edge of a cliff of despair, but alas I survived.
Going from one to three kids in the blink of an eye and a slice of a scalpel is probably the most asinine thing that could ever happen to a person. Nothing quite prepares you for the volume of insanity, immense loss of sleep, and guilt that comes with not having enough time. Enough time for ANYTHING.
But it is also the most ridiculously beautiful thing all in the same breath. My love for these three grows more and more with each passing day. I have a hard time envisioning life with all three of them mobile, going to soccer camps, and dance classes. That concept seems incredibly foreign when I'm still wiping hineys and making 8 prepared bottles a day for a 9 hour stint at daycare while I'm back at work full time. And footing the $2,400 a month bill for it too. Woof.
As for me, I am actually finding my footing in this new role as a mom of three. While I don't have a lot of time for myself and the length of my leg hair gets unruly from time to time out of sheer lack of time and / or energy to shave, I am happy. Content. Albeit really fucking tired. But a good tired. These three are my everything.
I am feeling the itch to blog again. I miss you. I miss the therapy. I miss the interaction. I make no promises, but a writer is always a writer. And I feel like this is one area of my life that I do need to take back for myself. We'll see where it takes me.